Commercial Delivery

Advertising in the age of terrorism.
  November 20, 2004

Setting: inside a mud hut somewhere in the desert.  Hassan, an Arab terrorist, is assembling a makeshift explosive device on the floor.  He has a pair of pliers in his hand.  Pleasant Oriental music plays in the background.  Enter Ahmet.

AHMET:  Salaam aleikum.

HASSAN:  Aleikum as-salaam.  How'd it go?

AHMET:  Badly.

HASSAN:  What happened?

AHMET:  The bomb never got there.

HASSAN:  What?

AHMET:  It got lost.

HASSANUPS lost our bomb?!

AHMET [ruefully]:  We didn't send it UPS.

Hassan's mouth quivers.

HASSAN:  You son of a dog!

Cut to Hassan picking up a Kalashnikov from the floor.  He guns Ahmet down.

Cut to the UPS logo against a brown background.

ANNOUNCERUPS.  We deliver.


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